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The Read-Aloud Family, by Sarah Mackenzie
Of the eight books we’ve done for the #scspbookclub, this is the only one (so far) that is a re-read for me. Meaning, I selected it for the book club because I previously read it and thought more people should be exposed to it! This book focuses on how how reading aloud to your children will benefit everyone involved in numerous ways. Read on for my top 3 takeaways . . . plus a bonus takeaway 😜
Build a Strong Mind
“Reading to our kids teaches them to think, make connections, and communicate.”
“…the academic benefits alone of reading aloud are so great, if someone invented a pill to deliver those benefits, there would be a line for miles and miles to get it.”
A few months ago when we did The Brave Learner, we learned how reading is one of the best ways to offer more knowledge and more intelligence to a child. Since The Read-Aloud Family is all about reading, it, of course, concurs with that sentiment.
It is through reading that we (and our children) are exposed to so many ideas, people, and even worlds that we wouldn’t otherwise experience. Not only that, but reading (and especially being read to) increases vocabulary and language skills, as well as reading comprehension. All of these skills then transfer over into other seemingly unrelated subjects, such as science and history.
I love this idea that if you want your child to be intelligent in numerous ways, you don’t have to specifically focus on each of those numerous things. Instead, you can focus on reading aloud to your child, and they can reap so much from that! Plus, I 100% could not do calculus these days (not sure if you could say I did it well in high school, either though 🤣), but I can still read to my kids and maybe that will help them with calculus, too! 🤣
Inspire a Good Heart
“If we tell them enough stories, they will have encountered hard questions and practiced living through so many trials, hardships, and unexpected situations that, God willing, they will have what they need to become the heroes of their own stories.”
While we can only live one life in actuality, we can get small glimpses into a variety of experiences by using books. Whether they’re reading or being read to, kids can face situations they may never face in real life (like a dragon or an evil wizard) or situations they may very well face in real life (like a bully or an earthquake), which can help them develop their own values, sense of purpose, and sense of right and wrong. They can learn to be heroes in their own stories.
As kids learn about people from various backgrounds, they can learn empathy for others. Reading about horrible things from the past (like WWII) can also help them learn empathy. When kids explore endless worlds and lives through books, their own worlds open up.
I love this opportunity that we have to explore other worlds with our children as we read aloud to them. Our hearts can be opened together as we read.
Grow Your Relationship
“When we engage in conversation with our child — when we ask him how his day went, what he’s worried about, or what the best part of his week was — we communicate that we are interested in his life and that we have time for him. When we have a conversation with our child about books, then, we communicate that we are interested in what he’s reading and thinking about. Without saying it outright, we tell him that it is a priority in our own lives to spend unhurried time with him.”
While reading aloud can help build a strong mind and inspire a good heart, perhaps its greatest benefit is that it can help parents and children grow their relationships with one another. Sometimes I have a hard time figuring out how to better bond with my children; I don’t want to “play” with them, and I don’t think being only a spectator of their lives is going to build a strong relationship either. We have to find shared interests/hobbies that can span the ages, foster good conversation, and ultimately bring connection. We have to find a way to really spend time together, not just in close proximity. Reading aloud fits all of these requirements, and it’s something that parent and child can mutually enjoy!
Reading together helps us spend time together, which is an essential piece of the puzzle. As I mentioned above, there are many ways I don’t want to spend time with my kids, so it’s important to find a few that I do. But to take it a step further and really build connections (between books, and between family members) Mackenzie recommends asking compelling questions about what you read together.
An entire chapter of the book is dedicated to 10 specific questions* you can ask to spur good book (and life!) conversations, but the basic requirements for a compelling question are that they are open-ended, can be asked about any book, and can be used alone or alongside other questions. The questions we ask our kids aren’t so much to see whether or not they understand what’s happening, so much as they are to help us get to know our kids and their minds better.
I’ve started asking Ada a few of the recommended questions, and it’s so fun to hear her answers! She’s only 5, so sometimes it takes coaxing to get her to answer my questions, but I’m just so excited to continue asking her questions about our books so we can continue to build our relationship, and I can continue to see more about what’s going on inside her head.
One key point I want to mention that the book highlights — never stop reading to your kids! We tend to stop reading to our kids once they can read for themselves, but if we continue to have special reading time with our elementary kids, our young teens, and even our high schoolers, we can continue to build those relationships. Plus, kids can comprehend read-alouds of a much higher reading level than what they can read at themselves. For instance, Ada is only just learning sight words, but I’ve been reading chapter books to her for over a year, and our latest chapter books would be considered middle school reading level. She absolutely couldn’t read these books on her own, but she still gains skills and knowledge from listening to me read them.
*Mackenzie’s proposed questions are as follows:
What does the character want, and why can’t he or she have it? (What does Dorothy Gail want most, and why can’t she have it?)
Should he or she have done that? (Should Goldilocks have entered the bears’ cottage?)
How is X like Y? or How is X different from Y? (How is Pooh like/different from Piglet?)
Who is the most _______ in this story? (ambitious, bold, brave, bright, calm, capable, careful, cautious, charming, considerate, cowardly, creative, dangerous, dauntless, deceptive, disloyal, demanding, determined, faithful, foolish, friendly, generous, grateful, greedy, happy, hard-working, honest, humorous, intelligent, loving, merciful, mysterious, naughty, nervous, noble, obnoxious, persistent, pleasant, proud, reliable, resourceful, restless, sad, selfish, selfless, sharp-witted, sincere, thoughtful, unkind, unselfish, virtuous, wise, witty)
What does this story or character remind you of?
What is the character most afraid of? Why?
What would you change about the setting or main character if you were writing this book?
What surprised you most?
Which character most reminds you of yourself? Why?
What is something you don’t want to forget from this book?
Bonus: Make Reading Joyful
“Home is where we fall in love with books. Home is the only place in which our children have a fighting chance of falling in love with books.”
In school, reading is a checklisted, purposeful task. Do they know how to decode the words? Do they understand what is happening in the story? Can they compose a thoughtful essay discussing the book’s theme?
These are, of course, necessary parts of reading, but they’re not the purpose of reading. We read to enrich our minds, to discover new things, and to feel joy! And we want all those things for our kids, as well. But if kids aren’t reading/being read to “just for fun,” reading becomes a chore to avoid. If we want our kids to love reading, we have to cultivate that love at home.
The author gives various ideas about how to do this. A few include creating a book club culture at home, allowing your kids to read whatever they like (even if it feels “light” or pointless), and making sure to keep your book conversations (with the compelling questions) easygoing and friendly.
Kids (and parents!) can’t get all the benefits discussed in previous points if they never actually read or get read to, so it’s so important that we help them see the joys of reading — so they CAN get those benefits!
Some other thoughts
While there is so much I LOVE about this book, this time around I did come to think it was a little narrow-minded. Mackenzie seems to think reading aloud is the BEST and ONLY way to connect with our kids. Reading aloud is certainly one great way to connect with our kids, but it’s just one option. There are soooo many ways that we can connect with our kids, if we just put in a little effort.
As I mentioned in the beginning, I read this book previously — and it was about a year ago now. I’ve been reading chapter books** to Ada ever since, and I’ve loved having an extra way to connect with her. Re-reading the book reminded me of all the good reasons to continue this habit, and to be more consistent with it. Reading together is not just “for fun” (though it is fun!!) — there are so many other wonderful results that are possible, too! I’m excited to rededicate myself to asking Ada compelling questions to help inspire her heart, all while building her brain and growing our relationship!
Check out my live conversation with Kimberly Christenson of @TalkWordyToMe_ about this book, and find more of Kimberly here.
Check out this post to see all the other books we’re reading this year!
**For those who are curious, here are the chapter books Ada and I have read together:
The BFG, by Roald Dahl
Matilda, by Roald Dahl
Mrs. Piggle Wiggle, by Betty MacDonald
The Christmas Pig, by J.K. Rowling
Sideways Stories from Wayside School, by Louis Sachar
Ways to Make Sunshine, by Renee Watson
Ways to Grow Love, by Renee Watson
Just Right Jillian, by Nicole D. Collier
A Place to Hang the Moon, by Kate Albus
Esperanza Rising, by Pam Munoz Ryan (currently reading)
Ada has liked all of them, and I’ve liked all of them except Mrs. Piggle Wiggle and Sideways Stories. I remember loving those two as a kid, but as an adult they weren’t nearly as captivating, and I also felt like they gave more ideas for bad behaviors than they solved 😅