“Baby” is the generalized name I provide for any age child I refer to (age 0-5 years), so look for other context to decipher if age matters for the specific info given. Most of the time, the term refers to infants and toddlers alike!
I’ve been known to say that I HATE the pacifier and I’d much rather get Baby sucking her fingers or thumb to self-soothe, and the pushback I always get is — “You can take away a pacifier, but you can’t take away a thumb!” This is certainly true — Let’s not be cutting off any thumbs!
And until now, I’ve never weaned my own child from thumb-sucking, so I didn’t know what it would be like to break the habit; I wondered if this process would change my mind about thumb-sucking!
But I’m here with a resounding NOPE! Kicking the thumb-sucking habit really wasn’t too difficult for us, which makes me all the more enthusiastic about encouraging babies to suck their thumbs/fingers rather than a pacifier.
So if you’ve got a thumb-sucker, don’t even worry about it! It’s a great form of self-soothing, and today I’ve got 5 ideas for you on how to break the habit when the time comes :)
1 - Talk about It
By the time you need to worry about dropping the thumb-sucking habit, Baby is old enough to have conversations and at least partially understand what you’re talking about. Start the conversation about how Baby is growing up, and tell her that big kids don’t suck their thumbs. Be careful not to shame Baby; rather, speak positively about how exciting it is for Baby to be growing up, and how you know she can do it!
2 - Read books
Anytime we’ve worked on a new, big-kid skill with Ada, we read books about it before we begin. Books (and even YouTube videos) can help teach the principles you’re trying to teach your child, and Baby might absorb the lessons better from an outside source than if the lessons just came from you! One book we got to help Ada with this transition was Thumbs Up, Brown Bear.
3 - Special Nighttime Gloves
This idea actually came from my mother-in-law, who used it on one of her daughters 30+ years ago! Buy special gloves that Baby can ONLY wear at night. Since the gloves can only be worn at night, Baby won’t want to take them off; and since gloves don’t feel right when sucked on, they deter the thumb-sucking.
If pretty gloves don’t appeal to your little one, boxing gloves might be a better option! (Plus those can be difficult to remove!)
4 - Sticker chart + reward
Have your child help determine a prize she’s willing to work for. Have her work toward that prize, earning one sticker for each day that she successfully does not suck her thumb, and earning the prize once she has at least seven stickers. You may want to say it needs to be seven consecutive days to win the prize.
5 - Yucky Polish
There are several brands of nail polish designed to deter nail biting and thumb-sucking. The one we used with Ada was Mavala. The polish doesn’t wash off, and the bitter taste remains for a few days, so Baby always gets a quick reminder to remove her thumb whenever it makes its way into her mouth.
Learn from my mistake — paint all of the finger nails from the get-go. I tried just painting Ada’s preferred thumb the first night, and she ended up swapping thumbs! I’m sure it wasn’t the same experience as her usual thumb, but any thumb is apparently better than no thumb. I didn’t chance it after that. Every single finger got the polish! This was the most effective deterrent for Ada.
A Few Notes
When should I worry about Breaking the Habit?
Most dentists and speech language pathologists agree that thumb-sucking should be addressed by about 4 years old. Continued thumb-sucking can interfere with Baby’s bite, leading to issues like lisps, difficulty eating, and even headaches, so we don’t want to let it go on forever.
Will one method be enough?
You may find that you need to combine one or more of these options in order to successfully break the thumb-sucking habit. We definitely used more than one of these tactics!
Our Experience
I wanted talking about it to be enough for Ada — to explain the reasons that she should stop thumb-sucking and for her to WANT to stop for those reasons, but I mean, come on. She’s 3 (almost 4), and I’m pretty sure if I can’t find the willpower to easily stop my own bad habits as an adult, she’s not going to have enough willpower to easily stop her thumb-sucking as a 3-year-old.
We used some variation of all of these ideas, but in the end, what really helped break the habit for her was the yucky polish. The polish had a warning on it saying that it might not be effective for young children since their taste buds aren’t fully developed, but the first time Ada got a taste of the polish, we definitely knew about it! She started spitting and spazzing out like crazy — the polish was not pleasant.
For the first day or two, she really only sucked her thumb a couple times, and each time she did, she instantly removed it because of the taste. Pretty soon, I noticed her bringing her thumb up to her mouth, only to quickly remember that she didn’t actually want to put it in, and lower it.
For the first three days or so, she complained about wanting to suck her thumb during usual times (the car, watching a show, feeling big emotions, falling asleep). She also had VERY big emotions. Kids (Ada definitely included) use their self-soothing mechanisms to help self-regulate and calm down, and since Ada’s thumb was no longer available, she didn’t know what to do with all of her emotions! I tried to stay patient and loving, and I offered cuddles whenever she seemed to need them.
After those first three days, it seemed like she forgot she ever sucked her thumb in the first place! I continued to paint her nails with the yucky polish every few days for a few weeks, just to be safe, but the thumb-sucking habit is now gone.
After a week of no thumb-sucking, she became the proud owner of pretty princess gloves, and she’s both proud of her accomplishment and happy to have her gloves now!
The Tricky Part
While her big emotions have simmered down, they are still closer to the surface than they were previously. This added stress for Baby can (and has, for us) result in regression in other areas as well, like sleep and even potty training.
This has been a bit difficult, but it is a natural part of a child’s progression. Babies can’t suck their thumbs (or pacifiers!) to deal with big emotions forever. At some point, they have to learn how to process emotions. That’s a skill that takes practice (raise your hand if you’re still learning this one!!), and Baby can only start practicing once she no longer relies on an aid like thumb-sucking.
Transitions often feel like big hurdles to overcome, but if we just jump in, the transition is over before we know it! If you need help with this transition or any other sleep issues, book a free discovery call with me today!