Potty training and sleep training — these can be two of the toughest things we have to do in our child’s young life, am I right?!
It’s been 2 years since we potty trained Ada, and I never got around to doing a blog post about it, whoops! But I still get questions about how sleep training and potty training intersect, so clearly a blog post is needed!
Today’s post will cover the methods we used to potty train, as well as how to handle bathroom needs while maintaining good sleep.
Potty Training Method
Let me preface by saying that I am by no means an expert on potty training; I am simply a regular parent who potty trained her kid!
While I am not an expert on potty training, I am an expert on sleep training. When sleep training, one of the fundamental pieces required for the child’s success is parental consistency, and I tend to think the same is true for potty training. Knowing how you’re going to handle the training ahead of time is key to having success.
I didn’t read any books before potty training, but I did read a friend’s notes on the book Oh Crap! Potty Training by Jamie Glowacki. There was a lot that I followed from the book, and there was also a lot I didn’t follow.
Principles I used from the notes:
Commando (no underwear) for 3 days
We stayed home during these days, so sometimes Ada was just naked, but usually she wore a dress to maintain a level of modesty. If this is also a priority for you, you can use a dress or a large T-shirt.
Watch for signs
Anytime we saw Ada peeing or about to pee, we would rush her to the toilet to associate the toilet with peeing.
No shaming for accidents
They’re just learning a new skill, so it’s tough! It’s not “okay” for them to pee or poop on the floor (so don’t say, “It’s okay!” — sends a confusing message!), but they’re also not in trouble for it. Instead of shaming, simply state the facts: ““Honey, you peed on the floor. The pee needs to go in the potty. We sit on the potty to pee.”
No treats for the potty, just praise
Bribery and treats are external forms of motivation, and we wanted Ada to be internally motivated to go to the bathroom – not to need a treat. Luckily for us, verbal praise and celebration was all we needed. A common phrase while potty training (and even one we still use today sometimes!) was, “You did so well listening to what your body needed!”
Principles I ignored from the notes/did my own thing on:
Age
The book recommends 20-30 months, but we didn’t potty train until Ada was about 34 months. It went SO smoothly for us that I plan to wait until Holly is older, too. I feel no pressure for my kids to learn something earlier than they need to. I found it helpful for Ada to be older, especially since she didn’t really need my help going to the bathroom (other than wiping poop for a while) since she could maneuver her clothes on her own.
Length of time going commando
The book recommends a full month of pants but no underwear, since underwear feels similar to diapers. However, we went straight to underwear after the initial 3 days of commando. Ada did just fine with that.
Read potty books
A few weeks before we started potty training, we got a bunch of picture books from the library about going potty. I tend to get books about any transition that is coming up!
Have a carpet cleaner on hand
We didn’t do anything to pee-proof the house; we just expected to clean up a few accidents during the potty training. Luckily, we had been gifted a hand-held carpet cleaner the previous Christmas, so we just used that to clean the carpet anytime Ada had an accident on the carpet, and we used towels and disinfectant to clean up any hard-floor accidents.
We were definitely lucky, as Ada truly was potty trained within those 3 days. She did have accidents now and then over the next 6-8 months, but they were rare. When they did occur, I think it was due to stress of some sort, because she would have several accidents over the course of like 3 days, and then nothing again for a month. Eventually, she stopped having accidents altogether.
Sleep and Potty Training
Kids are NOTORIOUS for coming up with excuses to resist bedtime and naps – that’s when they suddenly need a drink of water, a 4-course meal, 76 more snuggles, and – you guessed it! – 17 trips to the potty.
I decided from the very start that potty training was not going to derail sleep. Sleep is too essential!
So to avoid the aforementioned mischief, we simply kept diapers for both naps and nights until Ada was ready for underwear full time. I did make going to the bathroom part of the routine before naps and nights, but if she didn’t go, I didn’t stress.
It was only a few months (2-3) before we stopped diapers for naps. She would sometimes wake up dry and sometimes wet, but the real reason we stopped is because she wanted to. She really resisted the naptime diaper and said she could stay dry, so when we gave her that opportunity, she did indeed stay dry! I don’t think she ever wet the bed during naptime once we switched her to undies.
Nights took a bit longer, but after about 6 months, we switched her to underwear for nighttime, too. For that one, we did wait for her to consistently wake up dry for a week or so.
So if you want to potty train but don’t want to derail sleep, you totally can! There’s no shame in holding onto diapers to maintain good sleep :)